Hey kids you’re about to listen to

comedy podcast that means that none of

this is medical advice if you need

medical advice and medical care please

contact your doctor

welcome to the jock doc podcast

featuring

dr london smith aka

the realest podcast under the sun the

day we stop keeping it real

we’re done

[Music]

hello and welcome to the jock doc

podcast where we discuss fitness and

health

and how to incorporate our modern

understanding of science and medicine

into our daily lives but without it

being so boring

i’m your host dr londonsmith.com

i would like to begin by apologizing to

our listeners

we’ve received some feedback about the

excessive amount of technical medical

terms that i’ve been using such as

pubic synthesis diastasis and

inauguration day

so i will try to temper my terminology

to a simpler one in the future

here to help with that is our producer

cameron hey

dr london i just uh

i’m not feeling that you aren’t dr

london i need i need like a little

i don’t know shot of energy or something

i’m just not

i can be like hey but it’s not real you

know

yeah okay and we all kind of have these

what did i what did i tell you when we

started this podcast

one thing that i refuse to never do yeah

it’s uh

be not real you said that you yeah okay

that and like i refuse to never not be

also said you don’t work weekdays or

weekends

you said yeah nothing like during the

day hours

and you get really tired at night so

probably not then either

well yeah not at night time it’s too

dark also to navigate

yeah the the soft the light up screens

that we use

yeah so that’s what you what you told me

then these were all your conditions

and it has made it pretty difficult to

schedule any

yeah i take off i take off all holidays

regardless of religion

yeah all jewish holidays muslim holidays

and it seemed like you really worked

hard on creating new religions

to to give you more holidays well i

don’t create

i feel like this is a misconception does

the person who leads a religion

necessarily

create the religion i just do

my own stuff i just focus on what i want

to do

and like hanging out and stuff and if

people start following me naturally

that’s not my fault i didn’t tell them i

guess that

that what makes it seem the most

suspicious is

like i said like how many holidays there

are first yeah when first thing you do

is make holidays that’s

like before you establish the you know

the basic tenets of your religion

it’s always about the holidays yeah and

it’s just like every friday is

is the holidays yeah it will on mondays

because you said oh i hate mondays but

then tuesday started feeling like a

monday so

the next religion you made really

started making tuesday hammering it on

tuesdays had sort of an anti-tuesday

agenda yeah

yeah and you know eventually

just the amount and like we try to be

very inclusive

and you know we we try to keep out of

religion on the podcast which is why

this hasn’t come up before

but i just you know to some extent it

has become problematic

do you see it so

i just ask you for just like uh just

like a shot of energy to

to get me feeling it and then you start

hounding me about my religious beliefs

this is the show that you want to do dr

london

okay and yeah i’m sorry no i apologize

that is on me i shouldn’t be so critical

of your many religions

because whenever you say religious

beliefs just just the listener is aware

that there is a lot of plurality in

there like

it’s a lot of religions and a lot of

beliefs

that also strongly contradict each other

yeah and are mostly holiday oriented

yeah well

almost entirely yeah like a few of them

you also have to eat a bunch

yeah like that’s you just like

early you know you have ice cream before

dinner is

part of one of the recall yeah

and i just yeah but but once again you

know there was a big like burger and

fries based one

yeah and milkshakes and i’m just you

know

i’m not sure that that’s

it basically just i guess like any

sort of supervise your position type

someone who has to manage the time it

has been difficult to do scheduling

around it and so to some extent

i have i i couldn’t use

these same religious excuses at my

place of work you know the hospital

because they

they don’t recognize all of it quite the

same way you do

when this podcast started i told you

that i would never not be real isn’t

that right

that’s because i’m real and i’m just

being real and i’m just

telling you honestly dr london i’m just

not feeling it today

okay okay so you want to go back and

emphasize how you’re not feeling it

yeah because i thought we could i need

you to i want you

to like give me a reason to be excited

for

for this okay inject some energy into my

veins i’m putting i’m giving you a job

okay so sorry if you’re not familiar

with those

as i said that you know my job actually

strongly requires me to just show up and

do the work

but um so anyway this is uh

maybe i should somewhere except this is

our producer cameron

yay all right that didn’t do it

and then also with us is digital in the

house

did you know in the house

[Music]

when this podcast started i told you

that i would never not be real isn’t

that right

yes that’s

[Music]

the day we stop keeping it real we’re

done we’re done

what did i do what did i tell you when

we started this podcast one thing that i

refused

[Music]

one thing that i refused to never do

we’re

we’re done we’re done one thing that i

refuse to never do

be not real

[Music]

and later uh cameron tells him that we

can expect a special guest a

a physician is that right yeah that’s

right dr london

and so it’s it’s a doctor who’s come up

with a new way to

to uh to administer medicine to patients

um you know we’re always you know trying

to bring the cutting edge the new

medical news and technology and we’re

always trying to come up with new

medicines

yeah i mean as a show yes and we aren’t

usually

quite as involved in the clinical

research aspect but sure

we you know any chance to bring in a new

way to

address uh these these clinical

syndromes is always

you know something to look out for

before we move on i would like to

address a bit of listener feedback

i found this note nailed onto a piece of

wood that a patient was trying to

fend me off with as i was advising him

on his diabetes

medication regiment the note reads quote

how did you get that picture in the cake

dot dot

witchcraft end quote

uh so so first of all thank you so much

for your insightful question

here on the jock talk podcast to answer

your question

so so cameron i think they may be

referring to your preferred method of

cutting cakes which is with a framed

picture

so i guess this listener’s question

would be

is witchcraft involved in that process

well it’s the only way to get a perfect

rectangle

slice yeah okay i guess i guess i’d

always kind of been in the other

room whenever you do it so you don’t

just use the

the smaller diameter edge you use

no no no i’m not cutting it with the

corners i take a small picture frame

that doesn’t have a picture in it

i put it on the cake flat side and then

i just push it all the way through

yeah and then you eat that and like

what’s left in the middle is a perfectly

rectangle slice of cake

and if you’ve ever watched chef’s table

or top chef or chef’s reunion

or the chef zone or chef island

or the chef pack or

the uh john’s uh chef

hut i you know i haven’t or

uh the the the chef cauldron

or if you’ve ever seen um

like chefs and the chefs in the jungle

then you would know that a perfectly

rectangle slice of cake is the ultimate

sign

of a good chef the how the cake is cut

is what tell so not the ingredients not

the flavor not the consistency

no because presentation tells the

audience that i put a lot of work into

this

and that i care about the product

i could make the best tasting pancakes

in the world but if i gave it to you and

it wasn’t

in the shape of let’s say like your

favorite

character from

i don’t know let’s say news radio

let’s say you didn’t have a pancake in

the shape of andy dick from news radio

wouldn’t that piss you off and wouldn’t

that taste awful

i i feel like his presentation is key

okay yeah i i don’t watch all these

shows so you know i

maybe i just don’t maybe i know where uh

and if you ever watch the chef murderer

you would know that

yes okay i and once again you know i i

just

this is a different territory for me i’m

thinking to myself

regardless of the shape whenever i bite

into something the flavor is

is going to be a big determinant with

you know to tell me how much i like

something

or consistency as well but but

you know i’m once again not a chef so

this oh we’ve got consistency

you mean in in terms of shape no just in

terms of mouth feel

like the cake is gonna feel like a lot

going on

okay are you afraid to like we make it

bumpy we make it very lump

i make very lumpy cakes is kind of what

i’m trying to get at okay

i okay and that’s so whenever this

listener was asking

about the witchcraft using cakes uh

you your answer is essentially

that you make it really lumpy

yeah and then i use the picture frame

okay

all right well now for today’s medical

topic core pulmonale

so core pulmonale is defined as a right

ventricular hypertrophy

with eventual right ventricular failure

resulting from pulmonary hypertension

secondary to pulmonary disease so if you

need a refresher on pulmonary

hypertension

listen to last week’s episode and

corporal manali

is a complication of that so it’s just

whenever your lungs have the high

pressure system going on it’s it’s high

blood pressure

but only within the lungs specifically

so if that goes on too long then you get

core pulmonary

it’s most commonly secondary to copd and

other causes include recurrent

pulmonary embolism asthma cystic

fibrosis sleep apnea

and pneumoconiosis clinically patients

may present with a decrease in exercise

tolerance

they may have cyanosis and digital

clubbing and that’s whenever the fingers

get to be thicker

like kind of bulbs i mean this doesn’t

this doesn’t get boring to you

dr london week in and week out

typing in ian.wikipedia.org

and then clicking random article and

just reading it off on the show i mean

come on

yeah well this isn’t this isn’t bumming

you out a little bit i’m just i’m just

in a mood

yeah no i can tell because you you seem

to really

every time i feel like we’re really

getting somewhere like we’re kind of

hitting our stride

you keep interjecting with saying that

you’re not

feeling it i’m in a mood yeah you’re

bored

so i would say that almost so your job

as a doctor is to

cure patients and yet you’re not even

willing

to try to cure

your best friend and co-host and

producer

okay what if cure him of the blues what

if i tried

okay so normally you would sometimes

you would interject with something here

so what i just said was digital clubbing

you think that i should give a lesson

and then you interject my last son

no no i’m just i’m letting you know sort

of the way that you seem to keep

yourself

occupied normally so a lot of times if i

said something like digital clubbing

then you would say something about maybe

going on your computer

you know digitally and going

clubbing like going dancing maybe you

know

and that’s you’re like club penguin yeah

that would be something

yeah so so today it just seems odd

because today

you seem to not have the energy or no

maybe even it’s just the desire you seem

to have lost the desire to do any of

that

but it’s the passion i have no passion

anymore

but i’d love to do your job and then you

interrupt me

so let’s go i’m on wikipedia i’m

clicking random article okay i don’t

think that’s

okay i got stower bridge which is a

market town in the west midlands england

stour bridge is about 12 miles or 9

kilometers

west of birmingham the second biggest

city in the uk

so and i think fox news one time said

birmingham was a

muslim no-go zone this is about eight

years ago

but i think that’s important to mention

um

sitting within the metropolitan borough

of dudley at the edge of the black

county yeah

stower bridge includes the suburbs of

ambleco

lye norton old winsford

pedmore what what i can’t help but feel

like this

this is one of those instances of

something that is neither here

nor there like it’s very unrelated to

the topic

yeah it’s not here we know it’s in

england

yeah so and we know it’s about 12 miles

west of birmingham

which according to a guy on fox news

eight years ago and they got in trouble

for it they said

birmingham which is the second biggest

city in the uk was a muslim

no-go zone wow yeah

okay and i’m not really contesting or

commenting on that

i just you know i’ve gotta so our

listeners are here for medical lessons

they’re just trying to learn medicine

you know we got medical students we have

you know doctors who are trying to brush

up on a few things

i don’t my fans aren’t these people

you’re talking about

your cam girls yeah yeah i

the cam squad the squad of cam girls aka

my fan base

does not care about medicine whatsoever

you know what we care about we care

about we care that much of stower bridge

consists of residential streets

interspersed with green spaces mary

stevens park

opened in 1931 has a lake a bandstand a

cafe and a mixture of open spaces in

woodland

okay i great but um

so do you see so i’ve gotta i’ve gotta

finish this up for

okay so you have your fans and i have my

fans so if i could finish my appeal to

my fans

you’re saying we should have read them

at the same time and then no no no no

put the audio into different years

look we’ve tried that i do not think it

worked ah so

anyway so if i i’ll i’ll just try to be

quick about this okay so that you can

get to

your cam girl stuff because i know that

they’re good they’re big on this

so as i said clinically patients may

have

um digital clubbing was last thing i

said uh they can have signs of right

ventricular failure such as hepatomegaly

edema

and jvd and that’s whenever the the vein

in the neck

is is it’s it’s dilated it’s big

and they can have a parasternal lift a

diagnosis of corpulgnoli begins with

chest x-ray revealing enlargement of the

right atrium right ventricle and

pulmonary arteries

an ekg may reveal right axis deviation

p pulmonale and that’s peaked p waves

and right ventricular hypertrophy

an echocardiogram may reveal right

ventricular dilatation

but normal ventricular or start normal

left ventricular

size and function so this is useful in

excluding the left ventricular

dysfunction

so this is right sided stuff so

treatment involves treating the

underlying pulmonary disorder

diuretic therapy must be used cautiously

because patients may be preload

dependent

you apply continuous long-term oxygen

therapy if the patient is hypoxic

administer digoxin only if there is

coexistent left ventricular failure

many so copd patients die of right

ventricular

failure secondary to chronic pulmonary

hypertension and many does do

yeah i knew i actually met met a guy who

suffered from that unfortunately he was

at

the we met at the festival of glass

which the international festival class

is held

at ruskin mill in stower bridge every

two years

launched in 2004 it showcases the skill

and innovation of glass artists

designers and crafts people

the british glass by and all

biannual this is the festival’s it’s not

biannual

okay it’s biannual

is the festival’s flagship exhibition

featuring contemporary work

by glassmakers in the uk the exhibition

attracts collectors galleries and

museums from all around the world

okay so so i like how you did

try to work that in casually i

i i do appreciate that oh it just came

up yeah it was just natural in

conversation

so uh just the the last sentence here i

want to finish

so many deaths due to pulmonary embolism

actually result from

acute pulmonary hypertension and right

ventricular failure

uh okay and so cameron did you get

th you know everything to appease your

your fans the cam girls

uh yeah well just one thing i did want

to ask is that i had heard

that robert plant of led zeppelin

actually attended king edward

the sixth college which is uh in

stourbridge is that

would you say that’s correct in your

personal uh medical opinion

uh you know i i don’t really have a

professional medical opinion on

that fact mostly

that sounds like a trivia question

really so

and it’s not medical related not not

related to medicine so i’m not

you know i i don’t see how that would

apply

yeah you you haven’t you even gotten to

that part of your training because what

you’re saying

uh you know what sure i and once again

you know i

i am seeing some divide here between the

the cameron don’t you hear but how don’t

you hear how much more excited i am

yeah no i am i am glad that you haven’t

brought us back

to telling us about how you’re done

and bored and don’t care anymore

yeah and over it yeah yeah uh

no i i like that now i’m i’d love life i

love this podcast and i love

stower bridge all right or store bridge

sure there’s no way to know how it’s

pronounced there

yeah there wouldn’t be a way uh but

maybe

maybe our guest will know um no way

anyway

we can go ahead and move on from there

[Music]

all right uh cameron you said that we

have a guest today is that right that’s

right dr london i’m gonna go out on a

limb here

and this i hope i don’t get in trouble

for saying this

but this might be

one of the fastest guests we’ve ever had

i haven’t seen this guy

run but you can kind of look at his

figure and kind of figure out that he’s

probably pretty quick

okay so in terms of just speed not like

wit or anything like that just

physical speed okay so it’s like yeah

the fast muscle fibers

okay um so

yeah so as i was saying earlier the

guest is one of these types who’s like

sort of bringing something new to

medicine and we all like to see these

innovations

so yeah i’m pretty excited for this

guest uh

could you introduce yourself please

doctor

doctors thanks for having me on this dr

bill butler yeast

here and and thank you for acknowledging

my muscle fibers you know i’ve been

working on them for quite some time

when when you folks flew me in for this

and put me up in such a nice hotel i

mean you were putting me in hotel

so far away but so easy to run from

there to here it was really nice to do

that doctor so

thank you thank you for that yeah well

you know and i you know we’re working

with a budget here and so you have the

options of you could get a much

worse hotel much closer to the studio

or we could put you in a nicer hotel

further away that you can just run to

and then you know we’re not going to pay

for transportation or anything like that

of course

and i would say we you know we when

cameron chose to put you in

because cameron was really handling this

the bookings and everything

uh it was a mild difference so i know

for running

it seems far but

you know for most people who are from

here and who are used to

you know using their own cars

transportation it’s actually

this is the first time someone hasn’t

complained about it

uh you know about the lack of

transportation everything but anyway so

thank you so much for coming here i

should correct one thing

cameron here is not a doctor i i’m

actually the doctor here

so i i realize that but i think

i i believe in treating everyone who

forms who contributes to the medical

profession as an equal so in my eyes

cameron

wow you’re you’re a consultant but

a doctor is suffice because you know at

the end of the day it doesn’t matter

whether you’re a junior doctor

you’re a consultant or you’re the ceo

you’re a doctor

this is this is amazing i this i love

hearing this that you actually approach

medicine with a sort of egalitarian

attitude whereas dr

london he is all about hierarchies he is

all about who is whose boss

who is bossing around so and so who’s

giving instructions am i

in charge i love hearing that

look because i contribute to medicine

which i do

that sort of makes me a doctor and if

anything that makes me more of a doctor

than

someone who just got a degree and never

helps anyone

like dr london when you say i totally do

you know

do you know this is exactly the problem

the medical profession has

ask any doctor well let’s ask let’s ask

doctor who is the most important person

in the medical hierarchy oh i want to

hear this from you dr london

uh so the most important person that

really

i mean at a certain level the most

important person is

going to be the medical students

assistants and the nurses because

they’re the ones

who are kind of the first ones the

patient encounters but then again the

doctor is the one who kind of has a

knowledge to guide the whole process

so you know i feel like everyone has

their worth

but you know at least in the states that

the pay is given

you know a little bit more according to

training level and everything if that’s

what you mean

wrong wrong absolutely don’t

could you explain why he was so wrong i

mean dr london

i’m so grateful to be here but this is

exactly

what i’m talking about you’re clearly

the eldest in your family and you’re

clearly

were very greedy as a child and that has

fed into your

life now as a medical professional the

most important person

in the medical profession is clearly the

patient because without the patient

you don’t have an opportunity to doctor

and without an opportunity to doctor

you can’t make a difference in the world

so every single patient

whether they come in with a stubbed toe

or a life-threatening illness

without them we can’t be doctors

and it doesn’t matter if you’re wearing

a stethoscope around your neck or you’re

holding the door open

for somebody who’s coming out of the

restroom it all

counts if there’s a patient there

okay and you know how much i would even

sorry sorry to interrupt do you know how

much we pay patients

nothing nothing zero they don’t get

anything to be part of that hierarchy

with all due respect and i would even

say patients contribute to the

uh medical practice even more than

doctors because a

you wouldn’t have doctors without

patients b

doctors their entire expertise is

finding out what’s wrong with you well a

patient can tell you

how they’re feeling where it hurts

what’s swelling

all very important pieces of information

that make them

more useful than whatever the doctor’s

gonna find

i would say that every single patient is

a doctor wouldn’t you say

i completely agree let me hit you with

some very

interesting statistics so they say

one in four people will get cancer for

example

but did you know that every one of those

four people

is technically a patient because they’re

they’re at some point in their life

going to need the facilities of the

medical profession

and you can’t you can’t be part of that

hierarchy

unless you have a patient

to put you there okay so can we take it

one step further and say that because

every person is a patient in their own

way

everyone is the most important and then

doctors have the doctor education on top

of that regular patient level importance

no

it sounds like doctors are actual

doctors are the one exception i would

say patients of the doctors and in a way

doctors are the patients

it’s all legal you see dr london that is

ego speaking i mean i don’t go to dinner

parties

and say to people oh by the way i’m a

doctor no i don’t

i’m a human being first and if you if

you do say that sometimes that’s okay

i mean sometimes but that’s only when

there is willy waving going on and

and it’s a point it’s a point of clarity

but you know i i say to you dr london

dr london when when for example is the

last time

you had effortless stomatitis for

example uh you know i

i don’t believe that i’ve had that you

see

what are you contributing to the

profession that is

lining your driveway with all of those

cars so

yep whenever you if you ask just a ra

a random medical disease

that sort of doesn’t quite make your

case if you ask for something like

you know relatively more common like you

know do you have high blood pressure

diabetes

or since we’re from the states you know

obesity

these kinds of things are a little bit

more you know

common in that way do you see do you see

how there’s a distinction to be made

there

i i i totally do doctor but do you have

any of those three

you know as you say common ailments i

mean i

i don’t come across them that much i

have to say but have you got

one of those three ailments no

no i don’t and and i i get that you come

from a different place

where epidemiologically you’d be you

know encountering

maybe less well especially the obesity

epidemic is

bad here not so much there the opioid

epidemic

probably not as big of a deal there

just because you know our culture has

shaped

cooler about it yeah so

y’all are a lot more chill about opioids

and so like that

you know quote-unquote epidemic that we

have is uh

probably going to be less of a big deal

but i feel like this is

all sort of beside the point right dr

london that’s true so dr yeast

what um what what brings you here today

well i i was going through a midlife

crisis when when i was in my

my and i realized that i couldn’t quite

put my finger on it but there was

something

inherently wrong with how we doctor

and then it just hit me it hit me we’re

working within a niche market

we are totally relying on medicine

to cure ailments it’s like every time

you get sick we immediately go

to medicine to cure it or some form of

medicine be it

physical is in a pill or mental is in

therapy or what have you it often falls

under the same umbrella

and that made me think if i was building

my house i wouldn’t hire an electrician

to build it

to plummet to pick my furniture

i’d have different people from different

backgrounds doing it

but why is it why is it when we’re sick

we only go

to a doctor and we own special hospitals

specialists messages you’re special now

it’s not just enough that you’re

educated dr london and that you’re

better than everyone else now you

consider yourself special

well i just i feel like you’re going

down this road of

you know not all doctors are trained

and we have one like baseline i know not

all doctors are trained because every

single patient is a doctor and training

is irrelevant

okay i’m sorry dr yeast go on i i

interrupted so yeah so so anyway

and that made me realize that perhaps

we’re looking in the wrong places for

cures

we often think about managing illnesses

but when are we putting that patient

first you know when i have a patient

that comes into me with

transient lingual palpatitis if i give

them a pill

they’re going to take the pill walk away

and where is the

the value-add in that you know where is

where’s the experience yeah they’re

gonna walk away thinking ah this guy

doesn’t care about me

he’s just throwing drugs at me exactly

and we have to think about

you know medical prescriptions as a

service and not as a product

so i did a community college course in

poetry

and as i was in this course i realized

that poets had one thing in common

we remember them for their poems and not

for their illnesses

and that got me thinking that got me

thinking that

with the right string of words because

words are very much like chemicals if

you string them together

you can have an impact because you can

create something

that carries meaning in the same way if

you mix chemicals together you get a

pill

and that has a meaning and meaning is

just a different word

for cure and on that basis i found that

by stringing certain words together

in a poetic sense i mean

poet poetry is an anagram is it well

it’s not a nanogram but it would be an

anagram

for solution to medical ailment

give or take a few ladders and i figured

that poetry could be used

to rewire the brain to cure itself in

the same way that you can insult

somebody and it rewires their brain to

be

upset or to be sad or to be mad i said

why can’t we do that with poetry

why can’t we rewire the brain with

poetry to

cure to cause the brain no less to cure

because the brain is the most powerful

part of our brain

did you know the brain does most of the

thinking in our body so the brain

rewire the brain to cure itself

okay the value add is the patient walks

away enlightened

yes and probably way more enlightened

and feeling a lot lighter and better

than if you were to just throw

some pills at them or throw therapy at

them exactly or

you know just giving them like a a

checklist to make them better

and who likes checklists

yeah i mean dr london does but he’s a

freak so we’re not gonna even and i

would also say

so cameron sir cameron does throw

medications and medical supplies yeah if

you could refer to me as dr cameron

please

i’d feel more comfortable if you said dr

cameron yeah i would feel a lot more

comfortable too so

so doc dr cameron uh he

you know whenever he he’s not speaking

like metaphorically or whatever

he throws medicine and medical products

medical appliances at people whenever

they

if anyone asks him hey should i see a

doctor about this

that’s well i’m testing reflexes most

doctors you know they do that thing

where they just sort of like

they hit a hammer on your knee yeah

i toss things at you and expect you to

catch them

yeah so i mean that doesn’t really test

the i mean

in a sense tessa’s reflexes but it

doesn’t test the

you know the ones in the spine i’ll be

in mid-sentence i’ll be like okay

so how are you and then yeah they’re

gonna catch it real quick and then just

pills thrown at your face and you’re

having to

like i’ve swallowed pills on accident

not realizing what was going on

yeah but that’s very very irresponsible

you can’t swallow it i didn’t by

accident

that is very true well unless that poem

is written down

and one of the things i’m throwing at

you is a wadded up piece of paper which

it

is sometimes okay so anyway to get back

to

uh dr yeast you know you’re see your

method so you

you well i i did i did want to say on

something that was said previously

in that for famous poets we remember

their poetry and we don’t remember their

diseases

uh except for the one disease that most

of them have

which is depression and suicidal

ideation

because most of them end up killing

themselves even so that one

that one disease comes up a lot

that’s fair but most of the most of the

most of them don’t

most of the diseases don’t get mentioned

at all have you ever taken the wrong

medication for

you know an illness you know have you

ever taken

say an aspirin for a broken leg i mean

think about what that would do to you

yeah because i’m throwing them at myself

so i don’t really know what’s landing

and what’s not absolutely you know so

exactly in the case of those very very

very very you know few and far between

very rare that a poet

you know suffered one or two of those

things that you mentioned

in in those cases it was a case that

their own poetry wasn’t good enough

for them because no doubt for every

depressed poet i mean i have to be

honest i’ve never come across

myself but for every depressed poet

their poetry has probably cured

approximately two or three billion

people potentially yes wow

and i i’m just you know it’s not an

exact science but

it’s it’s think of a curve it’s like a

curve

graph okay yeah and just how it curves

around

yeah yeah i’m thinking about it

okay and so just watching it curve in my

mind yeah when you say

it cures do you mean it treats or do you

mean it

absolutely cures no trace of disease

completely totally totally totally

totally i i mean

it’s it it you know it’s like it

it can it can sense it can sense you

know

the need for follow-up it’s like it’s

like a broken leg

you know a broken leg and then you have

to help patients

you know afterwards where you have to go

back into the hospital as a day patient

and get checked out

poetry the right pump can get beyond

that and

see that you don’t need to do that so

not only does it cure

and address and remedy and all those

other

words that we have in our medical book

they

also make things better and that’s the

language patients need to hear

not cure and remedy or you know

make things better exactly speak people

i mean dr london i don’t know about you

i’d like to see some of this in action

yeah yeah i was about to get to the

you know i like i know that you’ve dr

bill butler yeast you have released a

few

you know books on of poetry and on

on the method by which you read poems to

help people could you uh could you share

with us some of

some of this i mean i think we can even

if we’re dealing with anything like i

i can say right now that i have a bit of

a headache do you have a poem maybe for

for something like that oh now of course

i have a poem for headache

but i i i don’t want to be an

irresponsible

practitioner here i must ask do you do

do you have a particular type of

headache

that you you know is bothering you or is

it just a general type of headache

um i i assume it’s because

i had a lot of sugar yesterday

i drank um 45

hard ciders high alcoholic abv

hard ciders and so i think just the high

sugar content

is sort of giving me a headache today

well and you should you stir

in sugar whenever you take that as i

recall

yeah and i do shots of vodka in it to

sort of level it out yeah

yeah you you have what we call

gia and that’s ah

you know i suspect it as much but i

wasn’t quite sure

it’s it’s the common the common hangover

as as known in some parts of the world

but by his algae is is what dr london

would recognize it as

clearly but um yeah so that’s

that’s that’s quite simple i mean some

people and and this is what you have to

be so careful some people would read the

works of edgar

allan poe or something like that as an

attempt to

to handle it but that’s not going to

work so

here’s what i need you to do dr cameron

are you sitting comfortably

uh i could be more comfortable no don’t

sit uncomfortably because right now

your inside is uncomfortable so you need

to replicate that on the outside

because the more comfortable you pretend

to try to be it’s like

somebody closing their mouth when you’re

trying to force feed them a pill it’s

just not going to go in

so you have to mirror the feeling on the

outside so that your body can be a

conduit to absorb the words because it’s

not just the

ears we’re trying to deal with here

we’re trying to get it into your whole

body

and while the ears are on your head

they’re not connected to the part of

your head that has a headache so we need

to use your whole body

okay so i’m sort of wadded up into a bit

of a pretzel

shape now yeah okay one thing you i

could just

uh okay and then now my arm

is stuck inside of the pant

leg so and then

one thing this is as uncomfortable as i

can get one thing no

no there is one more thing so all the

people you have fanning you

with the with the branches you have to

stop them from doing that

because that’s regulating the

temperature that’s adding to your

comfort level

i agree

but they only they only respond to me

waving them away which i can’t do with

my arm

stuck in my pant leg so i guess

you know your inability to address this

is adding to your discomfort level right

uh i not really because i don’t really

care

if i listen to you or follow your rules

that doesn’t make me uncomfortable

okay all right well i guess

we find ourselves at sort of a

standstill at this point

i’d love to be able to stand still i

can’t because of how wadded up i am

a human sort of a piece of gum

i think we could work with it as it is i

mean it’s not going to be ideal

i mean you may have a dose of diarrhea

or or possibly vomiting

afterwards but at least your headache

will have gone and

that’s you know what’s the most

important thing here that’s the dream

that all right can i hear a

poem or something this is a poem

and it’s simply called

i sat cold step

upon of which

my brow broke cider

abv lucozade

[Music]

to win which she came and ripped out

my liver such that

i could not take no more i did not take

no more

[Music]

across oceans filled with substances to

drink

would feed my demon soul

yet punish my empowered

kidneys

oh wow how’s your head i

feel a lot i feel relieved am i can i do

i have to be in this position still

you can relieve yourself of that

position at a time that feels good for

you but

you know like most things do it do it

slowly

you know i would say we are gonna have

to get a mop for that

you did find relief in other ways as

well i guess

okay i’m back into my normal position

but i do feel

a lot i mean dr london i do think

there’s something to this i do feel a

lot

lighter and a lot better yeah well i

mean the lighter could be because of

just the volume that you just vomited

but you know i there could be

something else i mean also vomiting

sometimes

helps people deal with the level of you

know alcohol but

but he said one of the side effects

might be a little diary and a little

vomit yeah and you did do both

so i i guess side effects you get you’ve

really got down

dr yeast one thing that that was very

much what came out

when we went through the phase three

trials you know we discovered that we

nailed to the side of

side effects nailed okay

so and i think that is one of the main

things you’re trying to do in a trial

like that

is being able to list as many side

effects as you can it’s not necessarily

trying to

fix the side effects it’s just

acknowledging that they’re there which i

think that

is important you know yeah because

you’re you’re trying to get work for

voice actors

to list the side effects and the

commercials for it

well it’s a dying industry they keep

giving these animation positions to

establish celebrities

very true it’s very true and so when you

think about it

uh being a voice actor who reads the

side effects on

on drug commercials

that’s sort of the ideal position that

you’d want to be in

but anyway i mean dr yeast this is this

is sort of amazing i feel like every

second that goes by i’m feeling better

and better i mean dr london do you have

any sort of ailment or something

you want to bring forth yeah i mean

so um you know i’ve had some uh

i guess i’ve just been stressed so my

stomach has been

kind of troubling me like i have an

upset stomach

is there a i don’t know is there

anything for that

yeah you you have a classic case of bora

bora game

which okay it’s one of those across the

pond’s term that i’m not

i’m not familiar with you you need to

keep up on your continuous professional

development

my good doctor that is very much an

affliction that

affects everyone all around the world in

when it comes to stomach matters

so a little bit surprised i’m sorry i

just

i mean terminology might just be the

difference but go on go on

so with a condition like that again

similar to the headache i have to ask

what do you think might be driving

driving that and you know is it is

you know that stress is that is it work

related stress is relationship related

stress

is it connected physically or

metaphysically to the stomach

problem uh you know what do you what do

you think yourself

yeah so i um i guess so for one thing

work i’ve been working a lot of hours

it’s kind of it’s been very demanding

lately

we uh sort of have an overburdened

healthcare system here and so i’ve been

just just working all the time and then

well you’ve also been stressed lately

ever since your

your workplace started letting people

bring therapy dogs into the office which

they keep attacking you yeah and not

just the dogs because the dogs

i kind of like you can throw some raw

meat

at so i started carrying you know just

raw meat in my pockets

for them but then you know you don’t

wait you don’t think that maybe that’s

what the dogs are going for oh what do

you mean

i no no you just the raw meat that you

have in your pockets i feel like that

did you start bringing the raw meat

before or

after therapy dogs started

i mean for lack of a better word

hounding you

well so i they sent us a memo

a week before these rules were going to

go into effect that they’re going to

bring the therapy dogs because you know

you can’t bring humans in

for some of these patients because of

the contagious nature

of this virus so they said you know

they’re going to be some dogs

don’t worry about it uh if you don’t

always get along with dogs

maybe have a treat so i’ve been

so i stocked up on raw meat and

before yeah okay it was before to answer

your question um

so i mean dr dr yee so you can see the

sort of trouble that my

my friend is in i think i think dr

london is

this is far more serious than you think

i mean think about it for a second

the gnost of carrying food for doc are

you

trying to compensate for an upset

childhood by feeding

other people’s depression dogs as i like

to call them

i and i wish i don’t want to

say no because maybe but i’m also

thinking like

these dogs really went after me and i’ve

you know you know i’ve gotten uh these

calls that i need to be

you know be somewhere because a patient

is about to die

and i’ll be running but then the dogs

will will outpace me

and so that has been a significant worry

but

in childhood something similar might

have happened

it’s it you know do we need to get into

that now or is there

is there a poem that can just is that

enough for me

i mean i was around then i do remember

one specific instance are you talking

about when you had set up

i had set up a lemonade stand and then

to compete across the street you would

set up a

a raw salami stand

okay well yeah that’s that i guess that

rings a

little bell i don’t really and then a

bunch of neighborhood therapy dogs

chased you down yeah well at that time i

couldn’t run quite as fast so it wasn’t

so much a chase

as a you had the we’ve talked about this

in previous episodes but at that age you

would have had the forest gump

leg braces on that’s right so they

yeah and i tried to run but once again

they were

they were from the movies so it was a

badge of honor really like people try to

make fun of it but it’s actually really

cool that i did that

yeah but i imagine they they slow down

your speed

yeah and like yeah and so and all these

dogs would come over and like just

attack and i don’t

you know they would attack me and i

couldn’t tell why i still to this day i

don’t know why

they just target me every time and i

keep wow

you know i’m a cat person and that’s

you know this experiences like that kind

of reinforced that

feeling that i’m a cat person

you know i’m so glad you’ve shared this

with me and this is exactly

what we’re talking about here there was

a risk that i could have

prescribed you the wrong poem in a

romantic

genre but the fact you’re a cat person

you know really brings it back to where

it all went wrong for you dr london

th this this isn’t about stress this

isn’t about stomach problems

this is about you never having a puppy

when you were young and that in turn

caused a massive and i i don’t use

hyperbole that often but a massive

spinopalapatine

ganglion ureology in your head

huh a ureology

i’m using the american term yeah

i just and you’re sure it’s because i

didn’t have a puppy because i

like once again it was it was because i

was so scared of puppies because they

would

attack me and try to eat me

yeah it’s okay it’s all it’s all it’s

the medical equivalent of a placebo

you know is what you’re talking about

there okay so

so what okay what what poem are we going

to use

to sort of fix this problem then because

you are the specialist in this so i

you know i defer to your judgment yeah

so

so this poem i’ve just been writing it

out there while while you were talking

i’ve crossed out a lot of words in it

for this poem um

it’s it’s fairly fairly hard-hitting so

i need you to get

really uncomfortable for this i mean i

want you to imagine you have just had

your heart broken by somebody that you

love deeply

and it is drip dripping on the floor

being eaten by those dogs as if it was

raw salami

that’s how i want you to feel on the

outside

uh okay so i just think back to maybe

like if there was a recent heartbreak

that i could actually use

and maybe also contribute to the stress

yeah okay

probably just all of the heartbreaks

probably all all of the heartbreaks

happening always like all of your

ex loves are right now breaking in your

heart

okay so and this will help me me

me bringing back all the the horrific

like the time whenever she told me she

would meet me and then she instead got

her gang of cronies which happened to

include our

dr cameron here they they came over to

egg me

just throw eggs at my body and then

i’m crying as you say that like i

totally totally feel your pain

but unless unless you open the up like

that

the poem the words will not connect

with your upper thalamus and

your epididymis and frontal lobe

right all those well connected things so

okay so i’m going so i just

i just have to remember the time

when uh she said

meet me on the roof and i went and then

she was on the roof and she pushed me

off

and said try to fly and i said okay

and then i was in the hospital i woke up

in the hospital

for a few months and and that’s you know

how i got into medicine i guess

because you woke up in a hospital yeah

i’d never seen one before

you became a doctor to compensate for

failed love

is what i’m hearing

so so i’m not feeling super comfortable

or if you’re gonna compensate

do it in maybe a cooler way not

like this yeah like ride a motorcycle or

this is the heavy metal or you know dye

your hair

but becoming a doctor is fixing other

people’s problems

yeah not yours get a hoop earring

dr london i hate to say this but there

is a strong possibility that after i

recite this poem you may

seek a career change as a professional

motorcycle riding badass i mean it’s one

option

okay i you know i don’t i feel like i’ve

invested pretty heavily in the one

pursuit professionally but you know i

maybe after the poem i’ll have a change

of heart

are you ready you’re ready

stop stop

each pump of my heart beats like a stop

sign

not moving just suddenly looking at me

so direct stop stop

stop reaching in and ripping out my

brain

and eating it as if

liver thrown to a beast

stop stop stop don’t touch my testicles

don’t

touch my fingertips do not touch

my soul stop stop

stop let me be the one

who places my hand upon my brow

and my other upon my heart and let in

the good

go go go

oh what happened

how do you feel wow it’s almost like you

woke up out of a trance state

yeah i don’t what what year is it

the year now yeah what do you

what do you think i meant

i don’t know like what year did radi

were you asking

like what year is it that radioactive by

imagine dragons came out or something

yes

that is what i meant i think maybe like

2011 2012.

okay well good good to know um

what’s your name

my name i know it’s doctor i know that

um

think again think again doctor isn’t a

name

dot-com i’m i’m doc

dot-com doctor

i said um

[Music]

what’s the most common one of the most

common names in the world i’ll go with

that one

smith john smith um smith yes

see dr cameron what’s happening here is

uh dr london

is going through a complete personality

overall and he’s giving himself a new

identity so he’s perfectly aligned to be

on

a new road for a better him wow

and this is the sort of i mean sort of

magic better than medicine medicine

that is really sort of blowing my mind i

think how many years of

therapy he would have needed to get to a

point like that he probably would have

had to go for hypnotherapy

and possibly play therapy and i’m

hearing yes

and maybe even surgery i’m hearing this

sort of

maybe something kind of uk british

accent so maybe my first name will be

related to that like uh i don’t know

what’s a

dublin or london i’ll go for london to

switch it up a little bit

so it’s london smith okay

smith because it’s the most common last

name yeah

just i want to unique and then

common and then i should get a website

are you imprinting on me do you think

i’m your mother now

i when you

ask it it feels like it’d be weird to

address it

it seems like i took a couple steps away

and you you took a couple steps in my

direction like almost like everywhere

i move you move closer to me yeah well

and me mirroring your actions

i and i’m sorry were we

were we doing something here are we

what was i

i don’t think so no you were doing

everything

you were doing everything london every

everything and

i must say it was

and i’m not using hyperbole incredible

it was truly incredible

are you hungry okay are you hungry

it’s a metaphorical question it’s a

metaphorical question

okay because like i

i’m feeling my pockets and i feel a lot

of raw meat and i don’t know if that’s

an answer or not

there are no questions to which you

cannot answer yourself

as uh somebody once said

okay well yeah that famous the famous

man yeah the famous man

yes i’ll wait to cook this though like i

won’t eat this raw because raw meat is

it seems gross but um

so so that’s something to eat later i

guess

uh whatev whatever we were doing i feel

like we’re at a good time to kind of

stop doing it oh you think it’s time for

the

for the chore wheel ch chore yes

that does yes let’s do those does it

ring a bell do you want me to explain to

you what the chore wheel is real quick

if you could because i’m not

really yeah so yeah so the chore wheel

basically and you’re not going to

remember this but basically you and i

accidentally let

a lot of chores and a lot of jobs that

we had to do

pile up because we were playing video

games and we weren’t doing what we

needed to do

so we have this gigantic to-do list that

we need to

finish and so i created this fun little

chore wheel and every week we spin the

chore wheel and we do whatever chore

is on the wheel okay

and actually dr dr yeast will you be

able to stick around and help us with

this chore

i love chores perfect

okay and then dr london so you’re gonna

just you’re just gonna

spin the chore wheel you’re gonna grab

that little thingy okay this one

uh-huh and then you’re gonna pull on

that okay pull that crank

and i and do i do i eat it

try okay no it doesn’t fit my mouth

it’s too big all right try spinning it

instead

all right oh you probably don’t even

recognize what some of these words means

but it says

create content for patreon

uh do you remember anything about our

patreon dr london

uh it was something about

avoiding the the parts

of the podcast we signed up for patreon

to avoid taxes it’s part of a grand

uh scheme okay and essentially

so we have and this is sort of a new

thing we have a patreon with additional

content

and sort of behind the scenes follow-ups

to

our past chores and maybe even some

follow-ups to our past sponsors and

things like that that you can sign up

for

and you can access it by going to

patreon.comtalkpodcast or by going to

jocktalkpodcast.com and signing up

does that does that clear things up for

you a little bit

yeah i i think it i

i don’t really understand what patreon

is but okay

patreon’s a site where you give us money

so we can give you

more content okay and so right now we’re

gonna actually we’re gonna

try to create some mini sewed some mini

episodes

just like lit right we’re like one

minute episodes is what we’re gonna do

right now on the patreon they’re full

length episodes like it’s a full thing

but right now we’re gonna do little

teaser

mini episodes okay about

the business of medicine and being a

doctor

and so we’re gonna do just quick each of

us

is going to host a 60-second

mini episode of any sort of medical show

that you like

and we’re going to provide it as content

on the patreon does that make sense

i i think so dr east are you following

i have no idea what he’s talking about

but i’m game

okay so maybe

uh dr cameron that’s you want me to

start off

yes doctor i am dr cameron okay and i’m

an osteoporosis

okay uh

i mean i i could also maybe i don’t know

who goes for

how does this work i’m sorry i’m just

very confused

just from the start uh i was just

thinking that each of

us would go one at a time right okay

okay

and host a one minute 60 second

podcast episode okay to provide

content for our patreon okay

so as an example here i’m gonna do uh

i’m gonna do a 60 second timer

okay and hi

welcome to cameron’s medical cram

corner where i’m going to give you

medical tips such as

leave your feet in the pool after you

swim

allow your feet to keep that fun wrinkly

soft feel and it’ll allow you

to soak up some rays and soak up some of

the sun more while being out of the pool

now my first guest today is dr london

dr london was the last time you kept

your feet in the pool

oh i can’t even remember because it’s

winter so

for for me at least so whenever i put my

feet in the pool it is cold

and sometimes there is ice but and

there’s probably a medical

uh advantage to having your feet in such

cold water right

depending on how one the rest of you is

maybe it would feel good

which is and positive feelings is sort

of a medical advantage that’s all we

have today on cameron’s

cram corner

okay i mean i think that’s gonna be a

perfect episode look i think our

listeners are gonna really like that

yeah if we just add some music to either

side then that’s a full one i think

i think if we honestly if we if we add

enough dj dylan’s sound effects to that

and stretch that

to about an hour we could have that be a

main feed episode

yeah okay and uh

dr yeast do you want to give a try at

hosting your own

sure okay let’s get that timer

all right and go

hello and welcome to doctors

i want today to tell you about the great

new adaptation of

talking to your family members when they

are sick and they need to go

talk to somebody professionally about it

the first thing you must do

is talk to them about it in person

or on the telephone or on an online

method

and you explain to them why they should

go to see somebody medically qualified

and then they go and

they get seen to buy somebody managed

qualified and afterwards

afterwards 15 seconds they will thank

you for it

and probably bring you around for tea

or supper that’s what you should do five

and if that doesn’t work tough try

something else

[Music]

perfect all right okay i mean i feel

like

all of these are gonna be this is all

again on our patreon it is not

small one minute episodes we have

full real episodes this is sort of bonus

content

okay so i don’t want to discourage

people from not signing up for the

patreon because they think it’s just

one minute episodes that we create on on

the cuff no off the cuff it’s

i think it is upon the cuff maybe

on the cuff so dr london are you ready

to do your episode

i i think so let’s let’s get that timer

okay

and go hi are you

a medical practitioner who lost

his memory and now finds himself having

to figure out how to practice medicine

despite lacking all the fundamental

knowledge to be able to do it

well this is the show for you try

just fumbling your way through retrace

your steps

where was the last place that you knew

how to practice medicine

hospital go to the hospital run to the

hospital

you have raw meat in your pockets and so

there is a problem with that

so when the dogs come for you you will

have to fight them off

and you won’t remember much except for

this new

traumatizing experience with dogs and

are you reliving it again

15 seconds is this gonna bring you back

to that time

where you had your memory erased and

this is all a vicious cycle

and what is this cruel reality that you

keep stepping into

okay all right dr london i’m

i gotta say i think we’ve finished this

chore don’t you think

yeah and i i think i remember everything

that happened that was weird

okay um oh so on that note

um thank you so much to dr bill butler

yeast for introducing us

to this new approach to medicine

thank you so much for for having me on

and uh dr london

thank you so much for for being open and

honest

with us i feel you’ve gotten about 6

million and i’m not using hype early

6 million new subscribers just on the

back of you being honest

and thank you thank you thank you

wow yeah i appreciate that so

uh is there any way for um our listeners

to follow you after this or

to keep up with you

me no i i tend to as a doctor i i tend

to focus on my patients i haven’t got

time

for for such things but i i may

recommend

a a chap i know by the name of neil

curran and you can find

him on such social things such as

facecrack

and insta instaboom and twitter

you’ll find him there as improv neil

because he couldn’t be any more creative

than that in coming up with a username

uh you can check him on the web on

lowertoton.com or if you’re ever

visiting ireland

uh look us up on improv fest ireland

improv utopia ireland

and the tight rope if you’re visiting

dublin

all right that sounds great and uh

dr cameron you know you i usually don’t

ask you but do you have anything to

promote

uh do i have anything to promote the

patreon

that’s something for you i guess well

i mean the page promoting the patreon

that’s sort of for

everyone it’s for me and it’s for you

and it’s for

all of our listeners because they are

getting something out of that too

right by spending three dollars or five

dollars depending on the tier

they’re they’re receiving a gift that

they purchase

yes and that’s not to be confused with a

gif or a gif

it’s not a moving picture they will not

be receiving a gift

from us ever no and that is a policy

i think we can stand by at least for now

i think that we should be strict about

that

but i i i guess i would like to promote

the movie her

okay with joaquin phoenix

um i haven’t seen it since it came out

but i remember thinking it was really

good

amy adams is in it oh okay

you know scarjo is the voice of the you

know the phone

yeah you say you know i i haven’t seen

it so

i’m gonna have to go on your word for it

but that’s you haven’t seen her

yeah scar who scarjo

yeah who’s that oh this is part of your

memory thing

i get maybe there’s still some gaps or

maybe i just

wouldn’t have heard anybody using memory

of scar ugh

perish or maybe have your chance to

discover scarjo for the first time

who knows uh all right well

thank you to uh dr bill butler yeast

again

um thank you to uh for now dr

cameron thank you to did you do in the

house

did you do the house i need you to get

really uncomfortable for

[Music]

i mean i want you to imagine you have

just had

your heart broken by somebody that you

love deeply

and it is dripping on the floor

being eaten by those dogs as if it was

raw salami

that’s how i want you to feel on the

outside

she said meet me on the roof and i went

and then she was on the roof and she

pushed me off

and said try to fly and i said okay

and then i was in the hospital i woke up

in the hospital

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

my name is dr lemonsmith.com and this

has been

the jock doc podcast see ya

i woke up in the hospital

i woke up in the hospital

[Music]

i woke up in the hospital

i woke up in the hospital you hold your

tongue as a scathing rebuke is delivered

to your attempt at a steely blue gaze

you fail at this gaze of course because

your eyes are green rather than allow

yourself to be bludgeoned by

the onslaught of reprimands you do what

your grandmother taught you to do from a

young age

you imagine a big fish trying to put on

small pants

teehee the fish isn’t frustrated just

sort of clueless in an adorable way

oh wait the words are changing in tone

maybe it’s time to check back in

and so i hope you can understand why you

shouldn’t put the toaster in the

microwave

it doesn’t speed up the heating process

but it can start a fire

you don’t really pay attention beyond

recognizing when to say

because honestly you have some fishy

thoughts to get back to

speaking of creatures performing curious

tasks don’t forget to leave a five-star

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jock doc podcast thanks for listening