Hello kids you are about to listen to a

comedy podcast that means that none of

this is medical advice if you need

medical advice or medical care please

contact your doctor

Welcome to the Jock Doc Podcast featuring

Dr. London Smith he’s got a PhD
And he’s spilling all the medical tea

introducing your host, Dr. London Smith
hello and welcome to

the jock doc podcast where we discuss

fitness and health and how to

incorporate our modern understanding of

science and medicine into our daily

lives but without it being so boring I’m

your host Dr. London Smith (.com)

I’d like to begin by apologizing to our

listeners we have received some

complaints regarding the abundance of

complicated medical terminology such as

catheter and season’s greetings so I

will try to tone that down in the future

here to help with that is our producer

Cameron hi dr. London hello in his

ambition to make this podcast as

relevant as possible to the average

listener Cameron has been building what

he describes as an advanced hearing

machine which he has refused to show me

but he tells me that it’s actually very

advanced so Cameron are we ready for

that big reveal not ready for the reveal

yet but I do want to clarify it is an

advanced hearing machine like it sounds

very advanced I don’t know what it’s

capable of yet but when you turn it on

the the beeps and the Boop’s it starts

making is it sound okay so you don’t

does it do anything that’s yet to be

determined

okay but it does make sounds oh the most

advanced sounds you can feel like you’re

in 2026 based on sounds yeah that’s how

just far in the future 2026 okay Wow the

World Cup you know yeah I guess I guess

that’s exciting

okay also with this is did you do the

house

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

good one all right

and later Cameron tells me that we can

expect a special guest so look forward

to that that’s right not going good

before we move on I would like to

address a bit of listener feedback quote

Diane I think the ribs have gone bad I

hate the ones with the Telos ace and now

my stomach hurts call dr. Sanderson sir

end quote

first of all thank you so much for

reaching out to us here at the jock Dawg

podcast we appreciate your feedback and

will strive to address it as helpfully

as possible although my name is not dr.

Sanderson what you’re describing it

sounds like it could be just an upset

stomach sometimes it helps to sort of

sit back and drink a carbonated beverage

but if symptoms worsen or you develop a

fever or other change in vital signs you

should contact your doctor so you can be

professionally evaluated in person once

again thank you for your question are

you sure are you sure she’s trying to

reach a dr. Sanderson or do you think

maybe her phone autocorrected Sandman

because I have been selling you as the

kind of doctor of dreams

Oh mr. Sandman I’ve been I’ve been doing

a lot of advertising kind of pushing

that angle that I’m like a sleep doctor

well so many of your patients don’t ever

wake up again so I have to assume that

you’re sort of a Sandman kind of figure

and so there’s been a whole lot of like

posters and billboards that I’ve put up

over the last couple weeks of you know

you and a big sleeping cap and you’re

kind of like yawning real big but you’re

like sprinkling sand on top of people

and then they’re fallen over okay well

so my patients your definition so they

leave the clinic but they do come back

like I know for you you just don’t see

them again if you happen to be at the

clinic uh-huh

but that doesn’t mean they don’t wake up

if I tell them like you know make sure

to get rest good I’m saying a lot of

your patients you I never I don’t see

them wake up is what I’m trying to say

well do you expect do you watch them

well no I mean I wish they would maybe

come over to my place why is it all on

me to track them well I guess that’s the

point I’m making here is that it’s not

like that’s not your responsibility and

assuming that they aren’t waking up from

their sleep that’s kind of a bold

assumption to make just based on the

fact that you haven’t seen them I’m

clearly helping your business here dr.

London you’ve got patients already here

contacting you online that’s okay that’s

true I mean is this can this be like a

beggars can’t be choosers type thing

okay well yeah in any case thank you I

guess for the marketing thank you yeah

and and thank you for the compensation

but what what what compensation will the

room what room are you talking about the

room I live in in your house now we’re

rooming you signed a contract when you

were asleep which I assumed was part of

your whole bit because your doctor

Sandman now the the bit that I’m that

that you made up without my knowledge

well I expected you to see the

billboards and stuff and kind of figure

things out sorry that I have to hold

your hand through everything okay well

then I guess that brings up another

question where are these billboards cuz

I haven’t seen them oh they’re in mostly

like Taos New Mexico okay yeah we’re not

based there well yeah but I figure at

some point you’re gonna be there I put

them up two weeks ago I have to sit

around and wait forever for you to go to

Taos okay well thank you okay well we

put your bad I’m sorry what was that

just let me sleep at the foot of your

bed no I it’s in the

on track we’ll figure out the sleeping

arrangements later okay and now for a

tale from the pediatric clinic we had a

family in the room because there was a

pediatric clinic with multiple siblings

so there’s the whole family and it is

often easier to assess all of them

together and all in a row so when I

asked the youngest of the patients their

age the patient replied I’m four and

five very enthusiastically we ask basic

questions about age school and

friendships – pediatric patients in

order to strain for warning signs for

possible illness looking at their chart

I could confirm that a patient was five

years old but he had had a birth date

that week when I repeated the question

the patient’s parents tried to explain

that the patient had asked their age a

few days before and they had given the

patient’s age as both four and five

around the actual birth date however the

patient whenever I asked again just

became more emphatic I’m four and five

I’m four and five so I finally decided

to let them hash this little issue out

on their own what did you get them I’m

sorry get them yeah for their birthday I

guess a clean bill of health

okay well I I didn’t have a present for

them but I but you just said it was

their birth so you you saw a five year

old you saw a kid turned five and you

would just push them to the ground and

say here’s your clean bill of health

well we we do give stickers get up and

stop crying maybe a lollipop or

something – uh-huh

nothing for deny related nothing like

one of those likes wiffle skateboard

things that were popular seven years ago

nothing like that

hmm no dr. London neither of those this

is why your taxes need to be raised to

99.999% so no five year olds are left

behind

okay Dex okay well we can go ahead and

move on from there will that kid be able

to move on knowing that he turned five

and his doctor didn’t even give him a

single tech tech halfpipe I feel like

that’s money 20

this is this is my whole tax thing Tech

Deck halfpipes for every family this is

the platform I’m running on oh you’re

running well have I not announced this

yet

I don’t think so yeah I’m running for

everything for whatever whoo whatever

will take me wait for office any office

yeah okay comptroller treasurer

mayor president 2020 doesn’t matter

we’re getting tech tax because you

hadn’t mentioned being on a track team

yeah I’m running for the track team as

well okay 2020 oh you’re waiting until

2020 to run that though well yeah

something likes me right now for you to

run on the track yeah it’s on Olympic

year either you know my favorite sports

the Olympics that’s that’s sure I do

know that okay well we’ll go ahead and

move on from there yeah yeah yeah now

for today’s medical topic infective and

no carditis

infective endocarditis is an infection

of the endocardial surface of the heart

meaning the inside surfaces like the

cusps of the valves in general you would

suspect infective endocarditis in a

patient with a new heart murmur and

unexplained a fever or bacteremia and

bacteremia refers to bacteria in the

blood stream to made I’m sorry did you

just say mmm it was just like a general

agreement okay I thought we don’t need

to stop the podcast every time I make a

slight noise it sounded like you were

saying like you were hungry whenever I

said blood stream I’m gonna be both

things isn’t that the beauty of language

I guess okay so to to aid in diagnosis

physicians will often use a

transesophageal echo

cardiogram which is when they take an

ultrasound view of the heart by going

down the throat diagnosis uses the dupe

wait a second are you told me there’s a

baby inside my heart no no I’m not but

you just said about taking an ultrasound

are you dr. London am I gonna am I gonna

be a father

okay for one thing I’m not taking no

true scent of your heart okay

I’m saying this is if someone has

infective endocarditis okay then we

would use a transesophageal

echocardiogram which uses the same

technology of an ultrasound like what

they used to see the baby the fetus and

in the belly of the pregnant woman right

so they use that device don’t get done

before a baby what was that

just how am I gonna afford a baby no so

I I do not believe that you can

physiologically become pregnant I don’t

think I’m gonna have to cut up my straw

budget your straw yeah I’ve been

spending $35,000 a year on straws ever

since people started painting them I’m

trying to kind of monopolize that market

oh you mean plastic straws yes you know

it’s become sort of a when I say become

I mean in the last like four years it’s

become sort of a point of contention a

lot of restaurants don’t want to use

plastic straws anymore maybe they’re

switching to something a little more

biodegradable so I started hoarding them

because you think that you’ll be able to

sell this to the highest bidder

yes no I mean not the highest bidder but

I mean I if straws are scarce it’s just

simple supply and demand I can start

selling straws for five ten bucks apiece

I don’t I feel like that won’t work so

well I just said it was supply and

demand and now I’m gonna have to cut out

that 36 thousand dollar a year budget

I’m gonna have a baby

Oh God dr. London can we can you take

care of them no okay

a few things here I don’t think that you

know you’re one of those doctors that

you are pregnant or that you can become

pregnant I think both of those are off

the table right now yeah you’re you’re

the type of doctor who you say if you if

you feel a baby in your heartbeat then

that means it’s it has life that’s so

you’re refusing refusing to help a bro

out I’m not giving an opinion on that

one way or another all I’m saying is

that you homie we’re roommates I sleep

at the foot of your bed I abort the baby

in my heart right now

dr. London well well go ahead and move

on from there okay so so diagnosis uses

the Duke criteria which takes into

account some smaller findings as well as

patient history and treatment is based

on which organism is causing the

infection of infective endocarditis and

that is also discovered via history as

well as blood cultures physical signs

and various other attributes so it’s a

you said it’s a disease or something

caused by an organism infective

endocarditis is okay so is this like

when I got sick after drinking that

whole organism milk you milked a whole

organism no you just go to the store you

know you have your your regular generic

brand milk and then you’ve got your

whole milk

that’s organism milk okay no that isn’t

um that that milk doesn’t cause

infective endocarditis if that’s your

question okay I just wondered if that

infection was caused by that but I’d

never mind I don’t I don’t suspect that

you either and a half like is my hands

supposed to do this is it supposed to

bend that way or like gush that way

neither nor here I would protect you

for a second I’m gonna gush it real

quick okay I’m pretty sure that’s from

the milk well there is milk mixed in

with it what but you need to go see a

doctor I live with the dog my roommates

a doctor now I sleep at the foot of his

bed okay well let’s let’s move on all

right Cameron do we have a sponsor today

[Music]

well dr. Linda we don’t really have a

sponsor today but I thought maybe we

could take this opportunity to catch up

it’s the holidays we’ve been both been

pretty busy

you know we just had Thanksgiving and

Christmas is right around the corner you

know I’ve been extremely busy over the

last couple weeks planning for and then

executing this last weekend

jocke con con I wasn’t aware of that

drunk con con that’s a joke doc con

convention that’s because you’re a con

artist

[Applause]

oh yeah jock con con so this is a

convention based on for our podcast for

our fans but celebrating specifically

that I’m a con artist yes that’s just

part of the what it’s easier to convince

people to come when you’re upfront with

them about who you are it’s just it’s

just an honesty it’s an integrity thing

I know you wouldn’t know much about that

but I I guess I don’t know that doesn’t

seem like it would bring people in if

they think it’s a con artist doctor

convention well I mean it brought in a

crowd it brought in a ton of people

our fans oh so we do have people coming

in oh yeah okay the convention was this

last weekend was a huge success

I can play clips from it oh wait you

already had it yeah no it was this last

weekend I was I guess this is all making

a little more sense I thought you would

be there yeah again I guess I did put

most of the billboards in Taos New

Mexico so and was a convention also

in New Mexico no that was it was only in

northern Minnesota okay yeah I guess

play a clip from it then yeah okay here

let me load it up real quick

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

what’s that are you sure this was the

convention oh yeah it sounds like a

concert no no no we had we had I mean we

had Jimmy Kimmel emceeing and we had the

one and only it is a Lea performing Wow

so that doesn’t sound to me like we had

games we had we had speakers I spoke at

a few of the you know sessions did you

mean to play another clip

i I guess maybe it’ll make more sense

and that was part of my session my

afternoon sessions that was used it

didn’t sound like you speaking no I mean

so I did I did a couple you know

sessions like I said I did one on kind

of podcasting I did one on you know

contentious relationships and maybe how

to work with people with roommates that

you kind of struggle to connect with I

did sort of how to acquire a lot of

money from people within the medical

field do me to know like a clip from

that session can you play a clip for me

real quick how the crowd is losing it

I don’t that like that that was just

that was just Thursday night that

doesn’t sound like the content of our

podcast when it was the content of the

jock dock con con yeah and you would

think that it would reflect some of the

podcasts but it sounds like it was just

the song fancy well I would say I would

say like maybe a lot of our content

sounds like fancy by Iggy Azalea oh how

many pop how many episodes of this

podcast have we done like a hundred and

like 32 or whatever I think we’re we’re

in the 20s right like 620 like 5 or

whatever every time I try to listen to

this podcast

like I remember recording it but then I

put it on and it goes I’m so fancy you

already know and I’m like I don’t

remember recording this but this month

this is the episode do you do you think

that you possibly just like have fancy

on repeat somewhere I don’t I mean I

think I just download the episode and

then I hit play and it goes boom boom

boom

I do this every Monday morning get in my

car on the right way to work boom boom

boom boom boom boom first things first

I’m the realest I knew every time you’ve

thought this is the podcast that I’m on

rather than it’s so weird how you know

we record these episodes and I must I

must just forget what it sounds like ly

what what we even did because I don’t

even remember most of this stuff

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

let me say that people loved it and

that’s it that’s my recap all right well

hopefully that I guess that hopefully

Jacques doc con con brought in more

listeners hopefully oh I hope so and be

ready be on the lookout for the

information for dot-com con 20/20 all

right well I guess thank you for

organizing that yep all right I guess

that’s it all right

Cameron you said that uh that we have a

guest today we absolutely do dr. London

okay sweet hello there hi hello can you

help me maybe well my name is dr. London

smith.com

this is Cameron or producer dr. luyt

London you had said you wanted more

guests who were in distress right no I

said well dressed like we want to have a

dress code kind of starting up now okay

so you can’t help me because I was

really confused by all the ads they kept

sending me to different places and I I

need help with my problem and I thought

you could help but I guess not I I’m not

dressed that well okay no it’s it’s all

right if you’re not well dressed that

was just something we’re trying to well

here let’s get him a jacket let’s get

him a blazer you know like they do

sometimes that restaurants if you’re not

dressed up to code

okay so let’s get him a blazer yeah okay

let’s put this on okay I think I think

you’re good now now is he up to your

your standards dr. London he’s your

wealthy rich person standards are we

good like a fancy restaurant now I don’t

know if it’s comfortable can this person

get help from a doctor now dr. London

I’m sorry well beau is your name sir

Michael Michael Smith Michael Michael

Smith okay well next religion says that

he believes in the universal health care

but only for people who can afford a

watch over $10,000 look if you can’t

tell the time on a baby that looks like

this then you don’t need that penicillin

see that’s what was really confusing

about the ads because some of them said

free health care and then other ones

said not free health care like literally

and I mean I I went with the ones that

said free health care and now I’m here

but I don’t know

wait so some of the signs specifically

said not free health care very

specifically there were two billboards

and one said with three health care and

one said without Cameron was that your

doing yeah you given me mixed signals

over here man I don’t know wait I don’t

know what’s going on anymore so I kind

of just cover all my bases

all right well mr. uh mr. Smith I guess

it’s nice to meet another Smith I guess

what what seems to be your problem

what’s troubling you

well I can’t sleep and I’m constantly

hot and then cold and my muscles hurt

okay well I’m sorry for that so I would

say this sounds like a reason to go to a

doctor like to go to your primary care

physician and establish care do you have

a doctor that you go to and sorry to

interrupt but anytime you hear dr.

London say stuff like that you can sort

of just imagine a chi-ching chi-ching

change that’s what he’s thinking of he’s

trying to you know get every last dime

from you and I was still confused on the

free healthcare

it’s very I’m not sure I understand this

oh wait is art okay I don’t have a

doctor they all left me in less away

they left me were they did you mean you

were fired as a patient

no they left me they came in and then

left and never came back

oh my gosh Oh like a home visit no like

in their office I’d be sitting in the

room in a gown with the back and tired

like they said and then I they’d come in

and they’d stand there and then they

leave and they wouldn’t even say that

they wanted me to go so I would just

wait there and then 20 hours later I’m

still awake and the janitor is like what

are you doing here bud Wow what what is

the longest amount of time you’ve been

stuck in a doctor’s office like this

with these horrible men just abandoning

you well I women on Wednesday before

Thanksgiving and nobody came back till

Monday so I was just there awake in pain

I’m sorry to hear that

well I I get I hope that you still

manage to have a happy Thanksgiving they

had some cotton balls okay oh yeah yeah

I’m just very sorry to hear that have

you I guess sometimes medical staff and

doctors can be so busy throughout the

day that they forget to tell a patient

they can go home but usually at closing

time they tend to check the room I guess

this physician you went to hell are you

talking about dr. London this is a

person who was struggling with

incompetent doctors who don’t listen to

him we don’t take care of his needs and

now you’re just being like whoa

sometimes the medical stuff forgets

things sometimes help this man okay so

you said you’re having difficulty

sleeping I can’t sleep and I can’t my

head my temperature my body temperature

is constantly fluctuating and it’s

usually too hot and then it’s cold and

then I’m just my muscles all of my

muscles hurt and it hurts so much and I

thought you could help for free but

maybe I was wrong I don’t know I’m

unsure that my decision to contact you

was a wise one well here let’s make a

deal after this session

you’ll spin a wheel and the wheel will

have things like free health care or you

know one times health care two times

health care three times health care that

determines how much you’re supposed to

pay wait I’m so if I’m understanding

this right I spin the wheel to find out

how much I pay mm-hmm so you might give

free health care you might pay one times

the normal amount of health care you

might pay twice the amount of health

care three times five times how many

times is it possible to hit the free

health care well I mean that’s just it

you know this is like a Wheel of Fortune

type of wheel there’s one slot for free

health care and then there’s 99 other

slots of various other amounts but if

you get that free health care you’ll be

covered easy well I mean I guess

starting with no health care and

possibly getting health care is better

so I I guess I could spin yeah well I

should chime in here I I don’t agree to

these terms this doesn’t sound good to

me well what do you agree with dr.

London this is this you take an oath

yeah that the Hippocratic oath sure but

so we have a clinic I would say you

should actually go to the emergency room

if you have this problem or to your

primary care physician let them know but

with these muscle aches and pains have

you done any strenuous exercise lately

well I don’t

I went rock climbing like a month ago

but everything started before that and

it’s just gotten worse since okay so

you’ve you’ve had these symptoms for

over a month

how many months let’s see I was in the

doctor’s office the last two

Thanksgivings

12 maybe 13 so it you you’ve been

getting very little sleep and you have

muscle issues but you went rock climbing

a month ago well yeah I got like I said

oh no there it is

I got a second wind and I’m sorry I are

you follows me it follows me around it’s

this this it’s it’s in our community and

they it only happens here I’m sorry I

was hoping it wouldn’t happen whoa whoa

whoa what’s going on well it’s uh you

know like when people hear noises and

they think a house is haunted yeah I

live in one of those houses sometimes

it’s not a fun existence I have is this

like an it follows situation is it

something that if you were to ya know

screw on my way out of this one oh man

I’m sorry to hear that okay it sounds

like it’s let up for the moment

hopefully I think I don’t know we’ll see

it could be back so you say it this

thing follows you around what what is it

what does it look like well it’s mostly

noncorporeal and it’s usually missing

its legs and it’s sometimes complaining

about its muscles and how it gets no

sleep it’s a very confusing situation so

your your it sounds like you’re caught

in some sort of I don’t know like echo

sort of loop are you are you being

haunted by yourself I mean that’s what

my shrink that left me told me but they

left before we got to the last chapter

and I’m still very confused and

everything still hurts and I thought you

could help the last doctors do I’m sorry

the last chapter you know like the you

do therapy and your therapist tells you

all right we’re gonna make it through

all these chapters and when we get to

the last one you’ll be all better

but I think she was lying I’m not sure

it’s all very concerning I just need

help okay I got to know what so the what

are these chapters could you give me an

example of one of the chapters in this

this book this curriculum you’re going

through um well I mean there’s the one

from high school and there’s a lot of

pimples and a lot of rejection and then

there’s the one from medical school and

that is short and then I ended up where

I am now and this chapters been very

long I wanted to end okay so these are

like chapters in your life that’s sort

of the idea yeah okay and she said that

you have one more to go and you just

have him then then she left the room

left she got up and left her office and

left me in there and that was a sad

Valentine’s Day did you so you keep

saying these doctors and this therapist

they all leave their room well they all

leave is what you say but it just sounds

like they left the room like they’d left

that appointment have you ever thought

of going back to the same place for your

follow-up appointments I have but it’s

like they don’t even like listen to me I

don’t know I wish they listened but it’s

like they don’t they don’t even think

I’m there and it’s just I try to talk to

them and I try to go back and then when

I go back there’s other people in there

and I feel awkward going in and

interrupting oh so you just kind of walk

into other sessions and start talking

well that’s what it said to do on the

billboards yeah it’s true I’m Cameron

have you been advertising for clinics in

general oh yeah the success the success

of our billboards has led to a lot of

people sort of outsourcing their graphic

design to me and I’ve been taking that

same sort of approach with like very

specific instructions you tell them

not just to go to a given like clinic or

location but you also tell them how to

interact with the doctors there here’s

the Billboard terrified person persons

weeping it says something’s behind you

something’s following you you have to

run to dr. blanks office and barge right

in and talk yep and it worked right

didn’t get me too far but I mean it got

you through the door see Market Inc okay

it doesn’t sound it sounds more like a

trap and misleading oh it’s a trap

yeah wait hold on you’re telling me that

I’ve been wasting all of my time barging

into these buildings and demanding

treatment from people that actually they

can’t even see me you just knew yeah

yeah I mean it’s a trap the financial

trap it’s not like I’m no one no one’s

being kidnapped or anything like that

but we’re kind of getting you into an

uncomfortable situation and then kind of

insisting that you pay $50 just for

being there that’s awful and then we

split the profits okay well for one

thing this does sound immoral Cameron

and also what profits no it’s not

immobile at all it’s actually I mean

it’s in an RV

most of these offices that I’m doing

billboards for are very mobile no I I’m

sorry I should clarify not I wasn’t

referring to automobile or mobility I’m

referring to immoral like immorality

like good and evil yeah no it’s

definitely mobile okay but I’m also

saying like hold on do you sleep at

night um I mean I guess it depends on

the night I’ve definitely had my share

of you know kind of stayed out late

stayed up all night type of nights

that’s you know but like in the bad way

or like in the I stayed up too late

partying wait because it sounds like

you don’t deal with the problems that

the patient’s seeking the kind of help

that your advertising

need and so you can’t empathize with it

hmm in a bad way well so I actually just

switched these buckwheat hole pillows

they’re very hard they’re insanely hard

and that’s gonna be the best night’s

sleep in my entire life because you know

what aligns the back was that a

prescription oh no you anyone can get it

just go to Google buckwheat hole pillows

they’re so hard rock hard well we

shouldn’t advertise for them if they’re

not a sponsor probably well I’m trying

to get them as a sponsor I mean that’s

the whole point of all of us is to get

the buckwheat whatever to sponsor us yep

one way or the other and if it’s

tricking really sleepy people from

barging into offices and insisting on

rest that sounds like an effective way

to me and driving across the country as

well yeah you know which office did you

go to can I ask

I went to the one in towel yeah Mexico

yeah they were very angry first they

have them in Mexico as well as New

Mexico

no New Mexico it’s like Mexico but newer

okay next we go to really yeah I’m sorry

so help this man dr. London what are you

doing yeah I guess I’m just okay so just

so you know what we’re doing now this is

a podcasting studio so really this isn’t

really the place for me to treat you

you’d have to go to an actual clinic I’m

a billboard say to come here I I believe

your question has been answered by

Cameron’s I will say in his defense that

his skills are they appeared to be

present thank you dr. London this is all

I’ve wanted this entire time it’s more

that it’s false marketing though it’s

lying so in that regard I would say yeah

it’s not good marketing

in the sense that it’s evil marketing

that’s not good means that’s like

literally the definition of evil is not

good I don’t know it seems pretty good

to me

anyway I mean what do you recommend dr.

lund and take some Tom’s take some

benadryl to help them sleep well I am

once again I would say maybe again if

you got a ghost thing following you I

think you gotta sleep sleep around with

someone to get rid of that

that’s it follows rules hmm let’s see

well I’m pretty tired no I think I’m

gonna just kind of go to bed okay but um

as far as sleep I would say you know

avoid blue light you know avoid being on

your phone whenever it comes to bedtime

don’t eat within say like three hours of

when you plan to go to sleep what do you

recommend for being haunted by a portion

of yourself

um like he’s clearly dealing with or you

not equipped to handle real stuff dr.

London you can only tell people you know

get off your phone at night that’s

really because the ads tell me to call

if I have this problem and I’ve tried

and they asked me who I’m supposed to

call it never works nothing works

fix him dr. London come on

yeah I’m sorry this seems to fall out of

the range of Medicine because this

sounds like you’re dealing with an

apparition which is traditionally more

of a you know a ghost hunter that kind

of station as opposed to a medical

approach so I don’t know if you have any

ghost hunters in your area I know

Cameron had started a ghost hunting

company but I think it went under is

that right no it’s tell New Mexico

there’s like 5,000 people yeah there’s a

ton of ghost company ghost hunter

companies in town there are oh yeah what

are the numbers

I mean I don’t know off the top of my

head but if you could under the ghost

hunter district it’s on 4th oh yeah

that’s creepy

well I mean understandably I should

clarify if I’m not mistaken Cameron you

did start those companies right

those are shell companies yeah well no I

mean there’s like Exxon okay no I do P I

don’t mean the logos or shell okay I

mean you started fake companies for some

other reason so their ghost-hunting

companies but they’re not like there’s

no no no I started a fake shell ghost

hunting company I started a fake Exxon

ghost hunting company sort of the fakes

fake BP goes hunting company yeah so I’m

sorry what was that mr. Smith it sounds

like he makes all sorts of fake things

like fake hurt babies well that I

believe is real because dr. London said

it was real oh okay okay

I saw an ad oh and I do think you

probably have a baby in your heart as

well and so you need to take care of

that boy I bet what dr. London said

earlier well dr. London what should I do

okay I’m sorry I was I was explaining

how a transesophageal echocardiogram

uses the same technology to visualize

the the inside of the heart in order to

look at the same technology as an

ultrasound that you would look at a

fetus so but I don’t I don’t believe

that either of you likely are carrying a

child in your hearts

at least not your physical hearts are

you know

that’s one of the worst things that can

happen to a sleepy man dr. London what

are you gonna do to help this

brokenhearted sleepy sleepy man you

called for help from you for now

just just pull through dr. Elanna – what

do you got come on I honestly I think we

should send this man on – to a physician

like someone who’s actually practicing

now change to change yeah we get it okay

for the money

well a night sending him away means that

I wouldn’t make money off of it exactly

oh he’s splitting tips you think that

all doctors practice a form of socialism

where we all go I hope someone in this

system does dad’s doctors like dr.

London he told me I did not say that but

and then again I think we could go ahead

and sort of wrap it up here I think

we’ve kind of narrowed down I’m not sure

exactly why or how you have separation

following you maybe it’s a trick of

mirrors or something in your house but

in any case we can go ahead and wrap it

up so Michael Smith is there any way for

our guests to keep up with you and maybe

see find out what happens with the

separation with your sleep things I host

a popular account called the Butch and

the bye where I talk about my sleep

deprivation ad nauseam with my imaginary

friend okay yeah and is that did they

have social media accounts as well yeah

yeah all that the names the same a very

unique name at the motion – bye okay

yeah

okay all right well thank you Michael

Smith for being on and dr. London just

give him one last piece of advice just

to bring it on home come on dr. London

help something good something to help

them he’s a sleepy man he’s nauseous

his muscles hurt he’s got something

following him that’s possibly an echo of

himself like an annihilation what is it

okay it might help to review your

medications because some medications can

cause muscle pain

okay stop taking all of your medication

no mushrooms I that’s that he didn’t

come the mushrooms yeah okay that’s once

again you should review that with your

primary care physician but anyway thank

you Michael Smith thank you to Cameron

our producer thank you to dude you doing

the house

[Music]

well dr. London

[Music]

and my name is dr. Lauren Smith hum this

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[Music]

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